sábado, 29 de maio de 2010

Off blast!

À uns aninhos atrás uns sujeitos que se julgavam engraçados, decidiram escrever um livro à cerca de um país fictício na Europa, que teria surgido aquando do fim da União Soviética, e que e descrito num, também, ficcional guia turístico (aqui está um samplezinho em pdf no sempre agradável português do Brazil). Este manual da arte da gargalhada usou todo o tipo de estereótipos concebíveis sobre europeus do leste que os australianos possam ter ou imaginado, mas na verdade o que eu quero trazer aqui à baila no blogue é uma side story, um acto promocional da referida obra, a criação de uma personagem,, Zladko "Zlad" Vladcik, um "talentoso" representante da Molvania (o dito país que não existe) no festival da Eurovisão. Em suma, as capacidades de comunicação na língua inglesa deste senhor são no mínimo horripilantes, e longo, neste caso, hilariantes. Enjoy!


 

Para quem tiver mais dificuldades, looka here 


Hey baby wake up from your a sleep
We have arrived onto the future
And the whole world is become....

Elektronik, Supersonik,
Supersonik, Elektronik,

Hey baby ride with me away,
We doesn't have much time,
My blue jeans is tight,
So onto my love rocket, climb,
Inside tank of fuel is not fuel, but love,
Above us, there is nothing above,
but the stars, above

All systems gone!
Prepare for downcount!

5....4....3....1! Off blast!


Fly away, my space rocket,
You no need put money in my pocket
The door is closed I just lock it,
(Ha) I put my (Ha) port plug in your socket (Ha Ha Ha)

The sonic sky is bright like fire
You and me gets higher and higher
Cut communication wire
Only thing can stop us is flat tire

Ha, Ha, Ha Ha Ha Ha

Hey love crusaider
I want to be your space invader
For you I will decend the deepest moon crater
I is more stronger than Darth Vapour
Obey me I is your new dictator
For you is Venus, I am Mars
With you I is more richer than all the tzars
Make a wishes on a shooting stars
Then for you I will play on my cosmic guitars!

Ladies and Gentlemen
Fasten your beltseats
We has commenced our decent
I trust you enjoy this flight
As much as you enjoy this accent

Now back on Earth its time for downsplash
Into sea of eternal glory my spaceship crash
People have arrived for cheer me from near and far
And as I float I open door and shout
"I am worlds biggest, washed-up superstar!"

(Supersonik, Elektronik)

As for sure as the sun rises in the west
Of all the seas and all the boats I am the bestest
come, let me put ring of Jupiter on your finger
Then like a smell around you I will forever linger
Ok, is time for end, no more will I sang
Let me take you back in time,
I want for you to experience big bang

Long live space race
Long live, Molvania

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